LEADING THROUGH HONOR
I. Introduction: Great leaders don’t act and treat others like the big cheese. Great leaders treat others as if they are the big cheese. Really at the heart is attitude.
Mk 10:46, Not as Lording…
God’s plan for leadership is that it never was meant to be something that intimidates but something that empowers, (treat her as the queen).
Great leaders not only treat people with honor; they create a culture of honor.
Great organizations have a code of honor, a defined set of conventional behaviors that guard the dignity, life and esteem of all.
A. What is honor. It is the esteem and value we show others that represents what we would most want to receive from others, if we were in their shoes. (Great Commandment- love your neighbor)
1. Honor is a gift based on their worth to God. Respect is something we earn. Honor is something we give. One of the ways we earn respect is to show honor.
Andy Stanley “When you honor someone publicly, you take a step to earn their respect publicly.”
People forget what you’ve done and said but they never forget the way you make them feel.
2. Honor is not denying people have faults; it is choosing to focus on the 1%.
(Phil 4:8) It is when we think this is what we should think on.
3. Honor is not flattery. Flattery is something you say to get something. Honor is giving something to build the bridge for truth to be spoken.
B. Why is leading with honor so important?
1. It connects with the deepest need of the heart. (Validation. Words on peoples’ head (PMFI)
2. It establishes trust. The pearls of my heart. Honor to cover our nakedness. Noah’s son Ham -Greatest fear is to be shamed.
3. It is the key to building bridges of reconciliation in a divided world. (Miles McPherson)
It is most powerful when least deserved.
Honor is especially powerful when given to those who disagree. Scalia/Ginsberg
Love is not rude.
So beautifully shows how things like racism are fueled by assumptions of dishonor- assumptions that discount, stereotypes
Any donkey can kick down a door. It takes a craftsman to build one.
Tragically it has never been easier to dishonor people. The divisions are so deep; fueled by words of dishonor.
When there is honor there can be healing and breakthrough.
One of the beautiful things we see is the power of honor to heal, reconcile, and restore. (Abigail- Honorable assumptions)
Jesus modeled this over and over to the outcasts of society, sinners, poor, children, Samaritans. Honor awakened the hearts of broken people to revelation of their worth to the Father- Giving them permission to be reconciled (Zacchaeus, woman caught in adultery).
Fire of conviction. Power of transformation to be treated like I could be/will be. (Jackie Pullinger- created in them the faith that they could change.) (*Miss Hast____)
4. Honor is the key to leading up as well as leading those behind you.
Honor all those in authority.
People can receive hard truth if there’s honor.
Healthy organizations create opportunities to speak truth is powerful- if there is a sufficient amount of a sense of commitment. I’ve got your back.
a. Highest way to honor a leader is to value their vision to sincerely prove that you have a dream to see them dream and that you are grateful.
2 kinds of workers: crabs and lifters
b. Be grateful, sincerely articulate the value of their work.
Lk 16:12 and if you are not trustworthy with someone else’s property who will give you property of your own.
He who receives a prophet in the name of a prophet receives a prophet’s reward. (Matt. 10:41-42) (Elijah/Elisha)
When you receive a child, you receive me. (Mk. 9:37)
A leader draws that kind of honor by giving it, Appreciation- recognizing and thanking people for their contribution.
Make a big deal out of normal things people do and they will produce greater things.
II. How do you lead with honor and make a culture of honor?
Humility that comes from knowing your value and worth to God; how he honors you.
We are a people of honor, who honor others as we have been honored by God.
1. Though we appreciate the honor others show us, we must find our esteem in God not people. (Jn. 5:41) Don’t seek the honor that comes from man.
Entitlement mindset quenches honor.
Wimber: “I receive encouragement from people but I give honor to God.”
2. Have a royalty mindset. (God choose Queen Elizabeth- My father is a king.)
B. Take/ make time to consider who and how
Gratitude – David- honors Jonathan.
C. Create a code of honor, personally and as a family.
Fully commit to:
1. We will only speak about each other the way we speak to each other.
2. Unforgiveness is not an option. We take it to the cross.
3. We will ban all hostile, negative, demeaning, critical, cutting and harsh words from our vocabulary.
4. We will notice and show true gratitude to each other for our work and effort.
5. We give others the right to disagree. We respect each other’s opinion and we will disagree agreeably.
6. We will keep confidences; stories entrusted to us are that person’s story to tell.
7. We will go directly to each other if offended. We will not make judgements until we have heard their side.
8. We have each other’s back. We will be there to share the load.
9. We will soak our relationship in prayer. We will assume the best and think the best and say the best to and about others.